tsukinofaerii | The Procrastinator's Guide to (Big) Banging

Bangs are scary. Really, really scary. There's deadlines, the mere mention of which has been known to send good writers and artists scattering to the far corners of the internet. Then there's the word count, which is usually high, sometimes much higher than you've ever attempted before. Finally, there's the knowledge that someone else depends on you, either for art or for a story to draw for. Collectively, it's enough to make you seriously think three or even four times before throwing your hat into the ring.

For the Procrastinator, all of this proves to be a special difficulty. Little things can become big problems if you have a tendency to put them off. But all isn't bad in the world of (Big) Banging. Every dark cloud has the ability to smite thine enemies with a thunderbolt from the Heavens. What do you want from the bang? Is it the challenge of trying to reach a lofty word count? A deadline to spur you on to victory? Or is it readers, a venue to reach new audiences?

None of these are bad reasons, but it means that you have to evaluate the bang you sign up for, and whether it will give you want you want. A smaller bang may work well for someone who wants a deadline. A larger one will bring more readers. Here's some things to consider when deciding if a bang is right for you.

What Should I Write?
This is a question that has haunted writers for centuries. A thousand years ago, writers were hunched over their knees, staring blankly at a piece of parchment, wondering this same thing. But in thousands of years of banging, we have managed to do it. And so I will let you in on a secret that has buoyed us for generations, passed down from author to author like a meta-textual STD. And that secret is...

Sniff glue..

If that's not an option, many fandoms have some sort of bunny hutch, and I bet your friends will be all too happy to throw you ideas. Look over your canon for loose threads to pull, or ideas that weren't followed up on. AUs are always a delight. Why not put Steve into armor and send him out jousting against Iron Man, the king's own knight? Or genderflip and write the Lady Avengers in a steampunk dystopian future! You only need a kernel of a story, enough to run with.

You can do it!

What if I Disappoint Everyone?
No such thing. Just saying the words, "I'm doing a big bang," is like to cause awe in the people who know you. It's akin to, "I'm going to Mars," or "I'm learning to fly a Pegasus". People get confused, and then scared, and finally start cheering you on, because we all like a good show. The only person who can be disappointed is you.

But for some people, this is a big concern. The biggest. The solution lies in picking your bang. You want one that selects artists only after the roughs are finished—not one that has early artist picks. You should also look for mods that you're comfortable with, it possible, and a challenge with procedures for easy dropping out. The Cap/Iron Man bang, for example, has no artist sign up at all. It's a free for all when the picks go up, and those only go up after the draft is done. They also have handy ways to drop out, and a copypasta phrase for those who are uncomfortable using their own words.

Even if you stick with it, having options available makes it easier for the procrastinator to stick with it. No one has their hopes riding on you, so there's less pressure to figure out if this will work early. It's all on you, and how much fun you're having.

And oh, will you have fun.

So... Should I do it?
How much stress can you handle? Most Procrastinators can reach a level four before panicking, which is three levels below the average for non-Procrastinators.¹ If you already have a lot of other commitments, be it work, school, family, other fanfic commitments, you may want to seriously evaluate your ability to commit to a bang. Here's a formula to help you decide if you should take a shot at the bang in question:

X = BB Requirements (The minimum Word Count divided by Days to Deadline, multiplied by 1.5)
Y = X divided by your average writing speed calculated in Words Per Hour. This is an estimate.
Z = 24 - Other Commitments

The minimum daily for writing is multiplied by 1.5 to allow for elbow room. Procrastinators have a fine line to walk between Motivated and Total Freakout. This is that space. For most bangs, this number will be fairly low anyway.

The formula for Z is simple, but also unique. Take a look at your schedule and map it out. Sleep, food and hygiene are givens. Add in work or school, family commitments or anything else. It will be tempting to cut those out, but trust me, you may need them. This should include the X for any other bangs you're working on simultaneously. Here's an example in action:

X = 1.5(25,000÷92) =407

This is the X value for the Cap_Ironman big bang, starting from the end of the signup period. Let's say our writer is a bit slow, and can handle 500 words an hour.

Y = 407÷500 = ~.8 of an hour, or about 49 minutes

Now, for Z. Figure 8 hours of sleep nightly, plus 1 hour for hygiene and another hour for food. Then let's say that our writer works part time and attends classes, for a total of 8 hours a day on average. Chores are another hour, and two hours for leisure television.

Z = 24-(8+1+1+8+1+2) = 3

Now, all you have to ask yourself is: Is Y < Z true? Is there more free time than there is writing required? Or, in terms of our example, is .8 < 3?

Yes! In this case, our writer has three free hours a night, and needs less than an hour of writing time to fulfill the bang's commitment. But remember, another bang of similar length would double that .8 to 1.6, which is starting to get awfully close to removing your elbow space. One more and this author is stacked. Only you can calculate how much stress you can handle right now before the procrastination button kicks in and you find yourself playing Neopets all day instead of writing.

1. All statistics pulled out of my ass.

Big Fish or Little Fish? Red Fish or Porn-Filled Sucker Fish?
So, you've decided to take the plunge, and now you need to find a bang. But what sort of bang suits you? Do you want a fandom endeavor, or to turn your hand at a genre? Are lots of people overwhelming for you, or do you crave the readers that come with big challenges?

The Cap/Iron Man bang is a fandom-based pairing bang. That means that anything goes, so long as it's in the fandom and abides by the pairing. Clearly, if you don't ship Captain America and Iron Man (HDU), you won't want to sign up for this bang. Even if you do, it's a smaller fandom, and not likely to garner a lot of attention outside its own circles.

An example of a genre bang is the AU Big Bang. This is for any fandom AU, which means there's a lot of fandoms and a lot of fics. It has a huge draw, which has the downside of making it easy to get lost in the noise. If you're writing a smaller, lesser known fandom, a bang this big could easily swallow you whole.

Both types of bangs have their pluses too. In a fandom-based challenge, the support and close-knit nature of the bang can keep a procrastinator going. These aren't just strangers in the vast sea of the internet—these are your main audience, and often your friends. Not wanting to disappoint them can keep a procrastinator moving when nothing else does. But a genre bang is more likely to be large, and have a lot of potential to draw an audience. If you're shy, blending into the crowd can help keep the pressure below the Panic Point.

In both cases, it's the size that counts. Some fandoms have ridiculously huge pairing-based bangs, and some genre bangs are small. Keep an eye on the amount of participation, to be sure that you're in a challenge that fits just right.

What about the Mods?
The mods can be what makes or breaks a Big Bang. If you're participating in the

cap_ironman bang (sign ups close at the end of April!), you're already cool to go because our mods are made of love and shiny things, but anywhere else this needs some thought. (Biased? Who, me?) A few questions to ask when investigating a bang's mods:

Do you know the mods already? Or of them?
Have they done a bang before? How did that go?
Does the bang look open, or does it seem mostly to be the mods and their BFFs?
Is the bang within their abilities, or have they bitten off too much?

Some people just are not cut out to moderate a big event, and sometimes what starts out as a small event can balloon very quickly. It's not anyone's fault, but it does cause problems. If the mods seem stressed and surprised by how many participants they have, you might want to think twice about adding to their workload. This is double if they're new or relatively unknown—everyone starts off new and unknown, but someone without experience under their belt and who's new isn't going to have a lot of resources to fall back on if things get beyond their ability. As a procrastinator, a mod who's frazzled presents too much of an opportunity to slack off. After all, if they already have over 9000 things to do, you missing your deadline is just one less, right? Where as a mod that's on the ball can make you feel guilty as all Hell if you don't keep with it.

Things to look for when in a mod team is experience, a thick friendslist of people who can pitch in if they need it, familiarity with the fandom and a fair hand at the wheel. You should feel comfortable admitting your status as a Procrastinator, as well as any other special considerations you might have. A mod that's doesn't need prompting to take steps to accommodate school requirements, disabilities and people with social anxieties is a very good sign, even if none of those affect you. It means they've put thought into this, and are ready for the difficulties. They'll keep a hand on your reins, which will keep you going when you want to balk.

Facing your Dragon
So, you've found the perfect bang, bitten the bullet and signed up. Now you're staring at a blank document and trying desperately to remember why you thought this was a good idea. There's so many reasons to be scared, and to want to back down, or put it off. But fear not! These monsters aren't as Big and Bad as they seem.

Deadlines are horrible, even if you're writing specifically because you wanted one. They're a date that looms out of the dark future, taunting you as they draw ever closer. This is where that math up top comes into play.

Remember X? X is what you're going to do every day. X is your word count, and bedtime is your deadline. From waking up in the morning to going to sleep at night, that is the only number you have to worry about. Do you remember what X was, for our rather slow writer?

It was 407 words. Before bedtime.

Suddenly, it's not all that bad, is it? You can do that easy, I bet. You can do more than that easy. And every day that the big Deadline approaches, those little 407s are eating away at it, snipping off the edges and snapping at the tail. By the time you're actually there and the fic is due, you'll already have had this monster slayed.

Willpower
Distractions! They're everywhere! How are you supposed to dedicate yourself to writing when there's a new episode of My Little Pony to be watched? It can't be done! When writing becomes work, procrastinators start digging in their heels. So you have to keep it fun.

Take heart, good writer! The joys of the pony need not interfere with your writing! I recommend the Reward System. Set up benchmarks for yourself. A convenient one is your daily minimum word count, but if your schedule doesn't work out to allow that, try a weekly. Cool, rounded thousands another easy number. What's important is that you not starve yourself of the shiny things that make you go. Make sure they're reachable, believable goals that dangle just out of reach without being beyond comprehension. Did you finish 5k? Go ahead and catch up on MLP. At 15k? Don't you have a movie you've wanted to go see? Save up a grand prize for your big finale, and you'll find yourself grinding away the closer you get.

Another method is the use of a Cheerleader. These are people who are happy to listen to you babble about your story. If you take a broken plot twist to them and lay it out, sometimes the mere act of explaining the situation can clear things up. Ideally, your cheerleaders should be people who want to read the fic and don't mind being spoiled for it. They should be people you're comfortable talking to, and who understand the fandom in question. Look to your flist or circle for the best cheerleaders, though many bangs have cheerleader sign ups and may provide.

Love the Beast
Writing a large number of words on a deadline can be pants-wetting scary. This hurdle is one you must face... (gulp) Alone. Only you can write the words and slay the beast. Your cheerleaders can encourage you, and your rewards can move you, but in the end it's you and the story. So maybe you should pick one you love. Pick a story that makes your heart pound and your fingers itch. Is there one you've been meaning to get around to? Do it.

One of the things about bangs is that they're hard work, and they can be overwhelming, especially if you've never done it before. The best solution I've ever seen for dealing with that is to pick a story that's its own cheerleader, reward and goal. For the procrastinator, this can sometimes be absolutely necessary. Others may use big bangs to try out sweeping stories they never would have made time for otherwise. Procrastinators must keep motivated and active, which means sometimes leaving the experimental stuff for other days.

This is also a time to consider the value of Rule 34 via meta.

Short On Words?
The time may come when you reach the end of your rough draft and find, to your horror, that it's too short. Don't panic!

If you're only short by a couple hundred or so words, that can usually be made up in description, dialog and setting. If you have more than two thousand words lacking, you're going to need an extra scene.

Look back over your story outline. Share it with you beta reader. What points could use some fleshing out? Did you not write that sex scene? Is there a cute moment that you dropped because it doesn't add to the plot? Is your B plot in need of shoring up? All of this can be added in for the sake of the fic with no harm done.

But there is a greater worry, one that takes effort to face. If your fic is missing a third of its expected length or more, then you may want to consider adding a subplot. Ideally, this should be a smaller plot that's already present but simply ignored. A minor character's woes can make for a good subplot. In an action fic, a romantic plot can add some meat to things. These don't have to be weighty things. It can be as simple as two people having an argument, or a joke about sewer alligators. As long as it ties in, you can drop in short moments and scenes that will support the main plot and add length to the story. Look at it as a way to make your story even more awesome. If your story was short, and you've slain your daily beast, you should have plenty of time to prop it up.

When the Dragon is a Hydra
Sometimes, we surprise ourselves. Sometimes that big bad word count that we feared isn't so big. Sometimes the writing is easy, and it's the stopping that's hard. You've passed your minimum and find yourself with a looming deadline and you're still not done.

This beast is one you want to face early. When you pass your minimum and you're still writing, take a step back and reevaluate your expected word count, then redo your math. What daily word count do you need to finish? What can you sacrifice to do it? How many hours a day will it be? Talk to a mod and see if your rough can be very rough.

Are you a bad enough dude to save the bang?

Remember how I made you include sleep, food and hygiene in your calculations? Feel free to remove them now. You may also want to consult this article .

Beta Me Gently
Many bangs require beta work. For a large story, it's really needed. It's easy to get lost in a scene, and twenty thousand words in it can be hard to remember what was going on at the start, but you can't just keep rereading because it'll slow you down.

I have a whole post just on betaing over here. All of this still applies to a big bang, with one major addition.

Betaing large stories has special challenges. As the writer, remember that your beta is going to be going over many thousands of words with a fine-tooth comb. There is no such thing as a fast, quality beta for a long fic. Be patient and work with them as best you can. Remember, this is your vision, and not everything they say needs doing. But sometimes, your vision needs tweaking. Keep an open mind and chocolate handy.

At Last... The End
You have done it. You wrote a bang-length story, received art, posted, and are due to recover from caffeine OD any day now. All you have to do is sit back and bask in the reviews, having proved to yourself that you can do it. Now is the time to swear that you'll never do it again. You're done! Finito! Finished! You have achieved the pinnacle of your art, at the cost of great pain, and no longer have to... have to...

Hey... Hey. What's that hot little bang over there?