tsukinofaerii (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tsukinofaerii) wrote2008-08-05 08:29 pm
tsukinofaerii) wrote2008-08-05 08:29 pm
ENG183 Tu&Th 7-9.15
Urg. This is just a short post, but.. gah.
Okay, backstory. My first community college (before the trek to Florida) was in Arizona. There were three classes there that I adored beyond all redemption. My Japanese class, my fencing class and my writing class. Those people--students and teachers--were my friends, and when the shit hit the fan I ended up having to leave all of them behind without more than a voicemail explaining why I'd left.
In my writing class, it was the last semester that Laura was going to teach. She needed to take time off for personal reasons--namely to work on her own novel. I love that woman. She's the one who taught me how to pay attention to the words coming out of my keyboard. She pointed out what works best for me when handling descriptions. She's the reason I have O-O-O (Object-Obstacle-Outcome) written on a card in my wallet, with a scribble of a mountain. The difference between fanfic and published fic in terms of style. I just can't begin to explain how she's influenced my writing. And on top of that, she's such a bubbly, insane, amazing person.
Today I got a form letter from the college. It said that she's coming back to teach, and that she hopes her old students will stop by or take the class again. It said "keep writing".
It just kind of broke me a little. I miss that class so damned much, but here I am. Stuck two thousand miles away. If any of my old friends show up, I won't be there to see them again. I won't be able to bring Laura cheesecake, or beg Suna for another chapter of her story. The two True Crime asshats won't tell me I'm wasting their precious learning time by cracking a joke. Did William ever finish his book? Will they sing The Scottsman while going for coffee at break on the first night, or just talk about their stories?
I'm just... yeah. Gods. I don't know what. But it hurts.
Okay, backstory. My first community college (before the trek to Florida) was in Arizona. There were three classes there that I adored beyond all redemption. My Japanese class, my fencing class and my writing class. Those people--students and teachers--were my friends, and when the shit hit the fan I ended up having to leave all of them behind without more than a voicemail explaining why I'd left.
In my writing class, it was the last semester that Laura was going to teach. She needed to take time off for personal reasons--namely to work on her own novel. I love that woman. She's the one who taught me how to pay attention to the words coming out of my keyboard. She pointed out what works best for me when handling descriptions. She's the reason I have O-O-O (Object-Obstacle-Outcome) written on a card in my wallet, with a scribble of a mountain. The difference between fanfic and published fic in terms of style. I just can't begin to explain how she's influenced my writing. And on top of that, she's such a bubbly, insane, amazing person.
Today I got a form letter from the college. It said that she's coming back to teach, and that she hopes her old students will stop by or take the class again. It said "keep writing".
It just kind of broke me a little. I miss that class so damned much, but here I am. Stuck two thousand miles away. If any of my old friends show up, I won't be there to see them again. I won't be able to bring Laura cheesecake, or beg Suna for another chapter of her story. The two True Crime asshats won't tell me I'm wasting their precious learning time by cracking a joke. Did William ever finish his book? Will they sing The Scottsman while going for coffee at break on the first night, or just talk about their stories?
I'm just... yeah. Gods. I don't know what. But it hurts.
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If I may, why did you transfer?
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My father, actually. I was in that "poor college student, can't afford to leave home" place. He'd always had a drinking problem, but towards the end it started to get scary--the "I'll kill you and your mother and the police will never catch me" kind of scary. So Mom and I just packed up as fast as we could and left. I'd already taken my finals, but I didn't even get to attend my final classes of the term. x.x Urg, I hate being this depressed.
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*Grimaces* That would...totally suck. I'm still sorry you had to leave, though. If there's anything I can do at all, just order thine minion to work.
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lol Thanks. (hugs) I'm lucky to have you guys. LJ kept me sane for a while there.
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Glendale Community. And I actually hated Arizona! Cacti and desert and concrete you can cook an egg on... blech. But I loved my people there. Even the ones I'm still in contact with I haven't seen in three years, And normally I'm not the type to think about it, but kind of kicked me in the teeth. :\
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I know how you feel about it kicking you in the teeth. Sometimes it just comes outta nowhere and blindsides ya. *hugs again* I hope ya feel better soon, kiddo.
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(hugs) Thank you.
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But when she says 'write' I bet she means it. One day you'll get to go back, when you're on your own. Keep believing it.
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lol yeah. I might very well end up going back. If only I could take a few acres of not-desert with me. (Cacti are painful, gravel yards suck, and I like walking barefoot outside without hearing my feet sizzle in the summertime.)