(staring in awe) Someone actually READS my journal? I don't know whether to dance (bad idea at work) or faint (also bad).
After re-reading the first part you mentioned, I know exactly what happened. The hair was supposed to catch on Riku's collar, but then I realized that it would take some interesting maneuvers to arrange that. So it bounced, and I just never took the unwanted word out. (sweatdrop) Unfortunately, it happens, and it's hard for me to notice after staring at this for so long.
The second thing I can blame entirely on the fact that I own horses. It's in my vocabulary all too frequently (usually with less polite words intermingled). I tend to associate the verb "shy" with the unexpected sideways jerk that almost always ends with a saddle horn in uncomfortable locations. It never occured to me that other people might not. (re-reads that again) That whole scene was such a pain to do... Huffle. But you're right. A Riku who keeps stupidly heroically getting in front of blows meant for Sora wouldn't "shy". Hm... "He rammed into Sora's shoulder, shoving him out of the way." That should do. I like the word ram for some reason.
This is exactly why I need a beta reader. ^^; Thank you.
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After re-reading the first part you mentioned, I know exactly what happened. The hair was supposed to catch on Riku's collar, but then I realized that it would take some interesting maneuvers to arrange that. So it bounced, and I just never took the unwanted word out. (sweatdrop) Unfortunately, it happens, and it's hard for me to notice after staring at this for so long.
The second thing I can blame entirely on the fact that I own horses. It's in my vocabulary all too frequently (usually with less polite words intermingled). I tend to associate the verb "shy" with the unexpected sideways jerk that almost always ends with a saddle horn in uncomfortable locations. It never occured to me that other people might not. (re-reads that again) That whole scene was such a pain to do... Huffle. But you're right. A Riku who keeps
stupidlyheroically getting in front of blows meant for Sora wouldn't "shy". Hm... "He rammed into Sora's shoulder, shoving him out of the way." That should do. I like the word ram for some reason.This is exactly why I need a beta reader. ^^; Thank you.